Thursday, December 30, 2010

R&R Is so close....


This post is going to be all over the place because I have R&R on the brain and I'm not functioning at full capacity because my mind is on one thing and one thing only: being reunited at the airport finnnnnnnalllllly :) This deployment can suck it for two weeks but that's besides the point.

I've made a to-do list of things to get done before Seth gets home. Today I was uber productive and scratched off at least 8 things! The rest are things that need to be done right before he gets here, such as stocking the fridge with his favorite beer food, fruits and veggies, getting a manicure and pedicure, washing the bed sheets, etc.

I've been working from home this week since the building is technically "closed" this week, but that's a whole rant and rave that gets my panties in a bunch and I don't want to talk about it. I could never work from home full time, because I have NO motivation. I have enjoyed going to the gym in the middle of the day, doing laundry in the middle of the day, sleeping in, showering in the middle of the day, etc. Next week, back to reality, is going to be killer.

Seth claims he doesn't feel the excitement about coming home days in advance. Once he's on the last leg of the trip him, then he can get excited about it, but until then, he tends to show no emotion. He's been like this since we've met, and I'm just the opposite. I get excited like 23094809 days in advance, and then I'm like a little kid and I project my excitement onto him, and everyone else who wants to listen, and he gets rather annoyed with me, because it's not here yet, but I get excited way too in advance. We've been texting a lot these last few weeks, and my cell phone bill is going to be pretty high because of the international texts. I don't care though. It'll make up for the lack of international texts in the coming weeks because he'll be HOME! I can tell he's getting excited though, even if he doesn't SAY it out loud to me. He's been calling me "babe" a LOT more than he has this whole deployment, he's been texting me more often, he's talking about all the fun we'll have on R&R. We have a good amount of money saved up to do whatever with when he's home, too. It's going to be the best 2 weeks of my entire life. :)

I was talking to a girl who works at my gym and she's pretty cool. I'll call her N. Somehow we, along with two other girls, got to talking about bodies and plastic surgery. N is a little bigger, and as she says, her booty "is wide" but not out. She told me today that she wishes she had my butt. Haha It was a compliment. Not that I have a perfect butt or anything, I've got a ghetto booty, not going to lie. It sticks out. I like my butt though, I really do. We did butt exercises today too and it was burrrrning. Anyways, Seth likes my booty too. He tells me so. He likes to smack it whenever I bend over. Or just in general. Not like hard, but you know, just a little "love pat." I can't wait for him to do this sooooon!!!! :) While we're on the topic, he has such a cute booty. He has a small one, but I still love it!!! No real significance to this, other than a girl complimented my ass.

So everyone in the blogging world is doing a year in review thing. Here's mine.

January - Seth left to go back to Germany, after being home for 2 1/5 weeks and we got engaged. :)
February - I left for Germany to go visit him before he deployed
March - Germany, Germany, Germany!! We had SUCH a great vacation together and I cannot wait to go back. I drank so much beer in those 10 days and we traveled to awesome cities and explored a lot. I also discovered jack and coke in a can, which is simply amazing. Ahhhh. March 8th, I came back to MI and that was the last time we saw each other in person. Seth's27th birthday happened at the end of March.
April - Seth deployed.
May - Deployment depression set in.
June - Deployment depression continued, I turned 26, booked a wedding photographer, school year ended, I started blogging.
July - Ummmmm....4th of July took place. I went to a BBQ. I faked happiness at said BBQ.
August - I went to see our wedding location in person, during summer months. (I booked it in January, and hadn't seen it in its full summer glory in person, and I was NOT disappointed!!) Molli started at work (Hi Molli!) and we became fast friends and she pulled me out of my damn deployment depression. Thank God for her :)
September - School started, time started going by realllly fast, thankfully.
October - Reached 50% deployment completed. Molli and I started our weekly Thursday night dinners together, time was going by really fast now.
November - Molli and I joined a bootcamp program at my gym. I kicked my workouts up a few notches, and spent the whole month sore :) Had a pretty good Thanksgiving with the family.
December - We were asked to be god-parents, my brother and sister came home for the holidays, I made it through Christmas, celebrated 1 year engagementversary. Anxiously awaited January 2011...

So, in summary, it's been a rough year. It got better as it went on, but still. I've been over 2010 for a while now. I have so many exciting things happening in 2011, it can't come soon enough. Only about 25 hours left. We'll be getting married, I'll be leaving my job, I'll be PCS'ing the crap out of my life, we'll be living together (on the same continent, time zone, state, city and address!! There's a first time for everything!!), we'll get a puppy and a kitty, and the deployment will be over.

All I've got to say is bring on 2011 :)

Happy New Year, everyone!

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

One year ago today....

...Seth proposed :) I still remember the day very clearly. We've been engaged for exactly one year, and we have spent a total of 17 days together in that year. I wrote this post back in July on the 7 month anniversary of our engagement, but it's better suited for today :)

It's also Wedding Wednesday and I have a small list of wedding related things for us to do when he's home on leave:
  • Cake tasting
  • Picking out and hopefully finalizing our invitations
  • Talking to my sister about our flower arrangements, bouquets and boutineers (she is doing all of them with her boyfriend!!! I just have to buy her a book on how to do the boutineers)
  • Maybe talk about music
  • Maybe he'll want to see the location in person
  • We'll be starting the vanilla extract wedding favors
I feel like I've got a lot of the major wedding things taken care of and now we have lots of little tedious things to figure out and do. Oh! We need to find someone to marry us!! I think that may be pretty critical.

Is it January yet??!?!?! Is it July yet?!?

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Military Spouse Video

I saw this video posted on one of the many blogs I read. The guy is fairly obnoxious, but he's getting the message across and that's what I like. Fast forward to 35 seconds in because it's pointless. But be sure to watch all the way through.

Monday, December 27, 2010

Our First Christmas Apart

Merry belated Christmas :)

I wrote out a super long blog but then decided it was too long for even me to read so here’s the shortened version.

Christmas with Seth away was much much harder for me than I was expecting. It still hadn’t fully hit me that he wouldn’t be home this Christmas until early evening on Christmas Eve, when I was headed to his parent’s house for their annual Christmas Eve party. My sister went with me and we were listening to the radio and John Lennon’s Happy Christmas (War is Over) song came on. I asked if she knew the title; she didn’t know about the War Is Over part of it and then when I told her, it all hit me. I tried really hard to fight back the tears, and was pretty damn successful. But it was then that I realized that he really wasn’t going to be home, and he was indeed on the other side of the world and this was our first Christmas being separated. We got to his parent’s house and we had a really fun time. We played BuzzWord and it’s an awesome game. I highly recommend it. In the middle of the game, I got a text from Seth. It said, “Merry Christmas, Love. It’s the future for me. Love you.” I called a time out in the game and I said, “I have an announcement to make. Seth said Merry Christmas because he’s in the future.” His mom got a kick out of the “because he’s in the future” part. Everyone said to tell him Merry Christmas too, and we sent a few more texts back and forth. We put the cookies and milk out with the nieces and nephews before they went to bed. After they were tucked in bed and it was safe, Seth’s sister Stacey drank all the milk and we put the cookies back in the cookie bag. (So THAT’S how it’s done, parents?!?!)

On the way back to my parents house, I was sleepy, cold, lonely and just sad that I was driving all alone, when the last two Christmases I was doing this drive with Seth. I couldn’t find a radio station that wasn’t playing Christmas music (and of course I had a Christmas music CD in the CD player) and “I’ll Be Home for Christmas” came on and I lost it. It was dark out and I was bawling my eyes out. Ideal driving conditions, let me tell you. At least the roads were clear, so that was good. I was crying pretty hard by this time and was telling myself to stop being a baby, he’ll be home in not a long time, he wouldn’t want me to cry and to suck it up. I got pissed so I slammed the radio button off and just drove in silence listening to myself cry. Awesome. Then I remembered one of the two Christmas cards that I got him. I went the funny route instead of the sad-because-we’re-apart-gushy route. One of the cards I got him said something, like, “you better not shout, you better not cry…” then on the inside of the card, it said, “Because Santa doesn’t like pussies.” I wrote on there that I really got the card as a reminder to myself, but I was sending it to him so he knew I was trying to be tough. After I turned off the radio, I said to myself, OUTLOUD: “Santa doesn’t like pussies” and then I cried even more because I was being a sad baby.

I got home with red, puffy eyes and a red nose and I really just wanted to crawl into bed, but my brother was home, so I hung out with them. We got into a discussion about when we’d do presents at my parent’s house, because I needed to leave there by about 8:45 to get to my in-law’s at 9 for breakfast and then gifts at 10. My sister threw a hissy fit and made some pissy comment about how I was going to be gone on Christmas day to go over to their house and blah blah blah. I was already on the verge of tears. I told them I didn’t care when they opened their gifts (I was the kid that always got up at 4 AM to open gifts, waking up everyone else in the house so I didn’t have to wait). I told her I needed to be at their house at a certain time, they could open their presents with or without me, in the morning or the afternoon, I didn’t care, but I had a strict time schedule in the morning. We never came to a conclusion and I went to bed pissed off because she was making it even more difficult for me. I got up on Christmas morning at 7:45 and quickly hopped in the shower. I thought I’d be up a little earlier than that, so I rushed to get ready. By the time I got out of the dumb shower, everyone was up and telling ME to hurry up so we could open gifts. Ughhhh they were really annoying me. I rushed through opening my gifts, shoved them all in the bedroom and then finished getting ready.

I called Seth when I got in the car, and lost it again. I tried not to talk too much, because he can tell in my voice when I’m crying, and I was TRYING SO HARD to be strong, but clearly I was failing. So when I’m crying, I just don’t talk, and it was sort of an awkward phone conversation because I am pretty sure he could sense I was crying, but neither one of us wanted to admit it. Haha I said I was going to his parent’s house and then my voice started to crack and then the tears started flowing freely and there was no hiding it then. However, I still tried. He said, in his so sweet voice, “awww babe. Are you crying?” I told him that I wasn’t crying, I was fine, all while literally sobbing. He then proceeded to call me a liar and then he reminded me that “Santa doesn’t like pussies.” Haha that’s love right there. This made me laugh and then I was laughing and crying and driving. He said something about how it might be embarrassing to show up at his parent’s house with a bright red nose, and puffy eyes. Valid point. Trust me, I wish I didn’t cry so easily. So we were talking about where I was driving, what part of the road, so he could estimate how much longer I had to get my non-crying face on before I got to his family. Basically I didn’t have enough time. The phone cut out and I called him back and he said he was going to hop in the shower and he’d call me after he was in bed. I drove past his parent’s house to buy myself a little bit more time of not looking like I’d been crying, but then said screw it, I was already late, I needed to get there and sucked it up and pulled into their driveway. His brothers came out of the back door, literally as I was parking and I thought, “oh how nice, they’re here to help me carry in the presents.” Hahaah nope, they were getting ready to hop in the car to go find a store open to get some orange juice. Haha I still asked them to help me carry in the presents and they were nice about it. (BTW, no stores were open on Christmas morning in the town, so they never got their orange juice). I still had a red and puffy nose and eyes as I walked in and hugged the family. Oh well, no one asked about it. I figured they’d know anyways. Seth called me a little while later and we passed the phone around and he talked to most of the family. I helped his mom and sister get the webcam set up so we could get his other sister in Atlanta on the webcam since she’s 8.5 months pregnant and can’t fly right now. Skype was being lame, so I suggested gmail webcamming since that’s what we use, and after a few minutes of installing that, we got it to work. I overheard Seth talking to his Marine brother (Shane) on the phone and then after they got off the phone, I was talking to Shane and he said Marine’s aren’t allowed to have cell phones over there. They have to use the call centers and especially on a major holiday like Christmas, he said the lines would be 3-4 hours long, for a 20 minute phone call. This made me extremely thankful that my love is in the Army, not the Marines, because that would be very difficult for me. He was very surprised that Seth is able to call me whenever he wants, and I can call him too, whenever I want. Seth called again when we were getting ready to open gifts and we talked for a few minutes and I didn’t realize that he wanted to be on the phone when his mom and Shane opened their gifts. He sent me a text message that literally broke my heart. He said, “I wanted mom and Shane to open their gifts. Dammit. Now I’ll miss it. Oh well I guess. It just feels like another Saturday to me anyways. Goodnight love.” I felt soooo bad. I called another time out during gift opening and said that I was going to call him so his mom and Shane could open their gifts but he said no, it was ok, he was just going to go to bed. I felt like a major jerkface and I should have known that he wanted to be on the phone when they opened the presents. Both gifts were his idea, and great ideas at that. I try to put myself in his boots for times like that and wonder if I’d want to hear the excitement of Christmas gifts being opened, and hearing what I’m missing or if I just wouldn’t want to hear the excitement because it would make me sad that I couldn’t be there, knowing what I was missing out on. I never come to a conclusion because neither sounds fun to me. I’ve made a permanent note to myself about this, for future reference if we ever spend Christmas apart again. Hopefully we won’t, but hey, it’s the Army and the odds are pretty great that we will. (Shane was my secret Santa partner and he got me a USMC hoodie. I felt like a traitor wearing it!!!)

Anyways, the rest of the day went well-ish. I cried again when we all sat down for dinner. I thought it’d be a good idea if we read The Soldier’s Christmas poem, before we ate. We had 16 people at dinner and there are 21 little paragraphs or stanzas or whatever they’re called, so I figured we’d go around the table and each read one, and then the first few people would double up to finish the poem. My dad said a nice opening to the poem…and I was bawling before we even began. When I was supposed to read my little part, I read the first two lines and then literally started crying hysterically. Sweet memories, let me tell you. I somehow managed to say the rest, but it wasn’t easy. The younger girls sitting across from me were crying too and neither wanted to read, so I read their parts too, through lots of tears and sobs.

After dinner, the younger girls opened their gifts. These girls LOVE my sister and me. It’s really cute. When they were over for Thanksgiving, they were asking all about my sister, where she was at, what she’s up to, why she wasn’t there, etc. They followed us around all day on Christmas, asking us all sorts of questions, asking about things that we must have told them a few years ago, things we didn’t even remember. For example, they haven’t seen my sister since Thanksgiving 2008, I think. Apparently my sister made a comment to them then that she could put her leg behind her head?? When we were eating dinner, they asked my sister, “can you still put your leg behind your head?” My sister and I looked at each other and started laughing and we both said, “how did you know that?!” They said apparently we told them that once upon a time. They said they wanted to sit by us at Christmas dinner, and they picked out our seats, next to them, for us. Anyways, the girls were opening their gifts and the older one said out loud to no one in particular, “this may have been the best Christmas ever.” It was really sweet and genuine and I was happy that I was able to help make Christmas “the best ever” for them, even if it wasn’t for me.

Ok, well that turned out way longer than expected, so sorry to take up so much of your time. Really – sorry, you probably have better things to be doing, but if you stayed through that whole thing, congrats to you!!

Thursday, December 23, 2010

Dream about homecoming

Last night I had a dream about homecoming. It was the most amazing dream ever!! I am pretty sure I cried in my sleep too, with pure excitement. Lee, Amy and Sarah were in the dream too. Here's what happened:

Amy and I were in this hallway of different shops, waiting for the guys to get there. We were looking at cute homecoming outfits for Sarah to wear, and I started picking some out. Lee walked in through some random door all by himself. He was wearing a black suit, with a white shirt and a red tie. Neither Amy or I were carrying Sarah, but she suddenly appeared and Lee was holding her. Amy and Lee didn't hug or anything, it was just Lee and Sarah. I was watching them in pure delight of being reunited and I'm pretty sure I was getting teary eyed. Then I looked over to the left and Seth came walking through the door in his ACU's. Hot damn. mmmmm Amy and I were behind this table thing and I couldn't get to him, and we just looked at each other and smiled. Then I walked around the other side of the table and we finally hugged and hugged and hugged. And I was sobbing, just so excited. I am pretty sure I was crying in my sleep here too. My mom suddenly appeared out of nowhere and she tried to get my camera from me so she could get a picture of us, but she started messing around with the camera and couldn't figure out the settings and then my friend Jen appeared out of nowhere and said, "give it to me, I'll take their pictures." She's all into photography and knows how to work a camera and we hugged for a really long time. I woke up shortly after that, but it was such a perfect dream and reunion!!!! Ahhhh, just a few more weeks.

I absolutely LOVE dreams like this. They make me smile immediately when I wake up and I always know the day will be a good day. :)

(Before this whole reunion part of the dream took place, I was on my way to this hallway of shops thing, and i was watching about 15 kids running around, throwing balls at each other. They were in a shopping parking lot and they were not being safe. There were young kids there too, under 10 years old. All of their beach balls started going into the streets and all of the kids ran out after them. I was sitting in my car with my sister watching all of this take place and I was telling her how pissed off I was that the older kids were putting themselves and the younger kids in danger like that. So all of the kids start running into their street, after their beach balls, and then a little girl, about 7 or 8, got trampled and she was laying in the street crying. I got out of my car and ran to pick her up and all the rest of the kids were standing on the sidewalk just watching, not doing anything. After I saved the little girl from the middle of the street, I carried her to the sidewalk and went completely off on the older kids, why they were playing games/throwing balls in a parking lot, running into the street, not looking for traffic. Oh man, I ripped them new ones, no joke. Then after that, I started talking through all these buildings to get to the one where I'd meet Amy, and we'd be reunited with the guys).

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Guest Blogger for Olivia

A few weeks ago, Olivia at Simply Sunshine and Daisy's contacted me to do a guest blog for her, while she's out having surgery. This was my first guest blog ever and I felt an enormous amount of pressure. After a few days of contemplating what to write about, a topic came to can read it HERE, it's called, "Born Planner Meets The Military."

Monday, December 20, 2010

Us?? God parents??

Seth and I were chatting on gchat the other day, December 13th to be exact. He sent me an IM that had a different person’s screen name, and I thought that he had mistakenly sent me something. I still read it though, and I realized it was a message/question from his friend Lee, who he is deployed with. I met Lee’s wife, Amy, when I went to Germany in March. They have an absolutely beautiful (and very tiny!!) daughter named Sarah. We spent the day together, traveling to Rothenberg ob de tauber, when Sarah was about 3 ½ months old. Amy and I have become fast friends during this deployment and have emailed constantly back and forth. When I met them at their apartment in Germany, I quickly fell in love with little Sarah, who was napping in a bassinet. She was SOOO tiny and SOOO perfect and I made a joke to Seth that I was going to steal her, but he told me not to because 1) well, that’s just wrong to do and 2) it would make our friendship with them weird. Both are valid points. (For the record, I would never actually baby-nap a kid, I just make innocent jokes about it, because I love babies. I’m confident that when we have our own children, I will no longer have the desire to baby-nap kids, and then I’ll be fending off other baby-nappers).

Anyways, back the IM that Seth sent me. He sent me a question from Lee, saying that him and Amy had been talking (he’s home on R&R right now) and they wanted to ask us our opinion on being God parents to Sarah!!!! I am truly honored and so flattered that they would like us to be her God parents!

I’ve never had God-parents or even known anyone who was a God parent. I always thought it’d be cool, but I never thought it would happen! Honestly, I’ve never considered it for my/our future children. I looked it up online to learn more about it, because it really is foreign to me. But I will take my role as her God-mother seriously and I’ll fulfill my duties.

So I have a question to my readers: are any of you God-mothers/parents? What are your responsibilities? What does it entail? Got any advice for me?

(Side note: the day this gchat conversation took place, Seth called me so we could talk a little about it in person. He said that he was excited to have the word “God” in his title. I responded with, “ohhhh God!!!!!” like with a tone of “ohh pleasseeeeee” and he said, “see!! You’re calling my name!!” But in all seriousness, I know he’ll take this seriously too and we’re both very excited and honored to be her God-Parents!!!)

Friday, December 17, 2010

MilSpouse Friday Fill-In #14

Number 14?!? Whoadang! Head on over to Wife of a Sailor to link up!!

  1. What is the best gift you have ever received or given? (from Jessica Lynn Writes)

    I like to think the best gift I’ve ever given to Seth is the gift I sent him before he deployed. I’ve had a blankie (it’s actually a pillow case) since I was a baby. I can’t live without it, even now, at 26 years old. He’s always made fun of me and my blankie, but that doesn’t stop me from using it. It traveled with me to Germany (yes in my carry-on. If that plane was going down over the ocean, I was dying with my blankie) and around Germany with him. It’s been to Alaska and back, twice, all around Michigan and across the US a few times. It’s been on business trips, camping trips, sleepovers. Basically, that blankie is my life. I wanted to give him something small and meaningful when he deployed, something he could keep with him. Don't be crazy, I didn't give him my whole blankie. (I’ve never admitted this part to anyone, not even Seth, let alone online!!) So I had a little chat with my blankie. No joke, I honestly did. I talked to it, said it was going to have a little bit of “surgery” but it was for a good reason. I told it that it was going to Afghanistan to help keep Seth safe for a little while. Then I got out my scissors and cut I little square out. Then I had the little square and then a very lopsided blankie. I took it all to my parent’s house so I could sew it up and make the little square into a little pocket. I like to think that he keeps it with him, but I really don’t know if he does. The best gift I’ve ever received was the promise ring that Seth gave me shortly before he to PCS’d to Germany. It was so sweet. We were in bed and he pulled it out and slipped it on my finger. He said it wasn’t an engagement ring, it was just a little present before he went to Germany. That’s a long enough answer, right?

  2. Do you celebrate holidays differently when your loved one is deployed/gone or do you keep tradition? (from The Albrecht Squad)

    This is our 3rd Christmas as a couple, but our first apart. I tried my hardest to make it seem Christmasy in Afghanistan for him. I sent him three boxes of goodies/presents and a box of lights for a little decoration. He asked for me not to send a tree, and I agreed to this, but I still wish I could have. I sent him a stocking with more stuff, and I have another stocking at home for when we celebrate Christmas together when he’s home on leave. I’ll be spending the morning at my parents house, going to his parents house to be with them while they open gifts and then I’ll be going back to my parents for Christmas dinner. (This is pretty similar to what we would have done if he were home…except we’d wake up in the apartment, do our Christmas together, go to his family’s house, and then to my family’s house).

  3. If you celebrate Christmas, do you put an angel, star or something else on the top of your tree?

    Ha – we have a little snowman for our tree topper. He has a name even: Terry the Snowman. We acquired it in Erie, PA, when we were driving home on our first road trip together from NY to MI for the holidays. We stopped at a wings place that he always used to stop at when he’d drive home/back. He can do those little vending machine with the claws really well. I have SO many stuffed animals and other random things from those machines from him. He got us a little snowman and when we got in the car he said his name was Terry. I don’t remember how it came about to be our tree topper (he probably put it up on the top of the tree once it was set up because I’m sure he didn’t like my girly tree-topper prior to him. Then he probably proclaimed Terry was our tree topper). However, Terry is in a cold, lonely storage unit in Germany right now, so I have to go purchase a new one, which I’ll be doing tonight.

  4. What are your three favorite websites?

    Wunderground weather
    . I always check the weather where Seth is at they always have amazing pictures from all over the world, WunderPhotos they’re called. I can spend an unlimited amount of time just looking at picture after picture. Like this picture from Africa. So pretty! Be sure to check out the other pics in the series...a mama and baby zebra and rhinos playing in the mud!!!!

  5. On your man do you prefer… boxers, briefs or boxer briefs? Or commando? (yeah, I’m starting to get desperate for questions!)

    I love boxer brief trunks. They show off his junk nicely. It’s not really “junk” but you know what I mean. They’re sexy.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

December 16, 2009...

This day last year...

I was waiting very very anxiously.
I jumped at every single phone call.
I jumped at every single text message.
I contemplated everything I did, everywhere I went.
I sent his dad a text message that said, “don’t forget!!!"
I was wearing khaki colored slacks and a black low-ish cut shirt. My hair was straightened.
Do I leave work now to go home, or do I stay a few more minutes?
Is he coming to my work to surprise me?
Will he be waiting at home when I get there?
I was royally pissed off that I hadn’t heard from him by 4:15 in the afternoon, so I left work and headed home.
I got home and paced back and forth.
I went to my bedroom and looked out the bedroom window every 2 seconds.
I ate a few wheat thins and hummus.
I looked out my bedroom window again.
My heart was pounding so fast.
I heard a LOUD pounding on my door.
I chugged a big gulp of water to wash down the roasted red pepper flavor of hummus in my mouth.
I ran to the door.
I looked out my peep hole.
Seth was home :)
I was mad at him because he refused (by personal choice) to tell me what time he would be home. I barely knew the date he’d be home.
I boycotted him and hugged his dad before I hugged him.
Yeah, I’m a jerk.
Then his dad said something like, awww come on!!
I think I stomped my foot and said I was mad at him for not telling me when he’d be home.
Then I caved and hugged him.
My short term memory after that is shot.
I’m pretty sure he kept staring at me and trying to steal kisses.
He was wearing jeans and a black sweater.
I was still trying to be mad at him. It was hard though.
We had dinner: spaghetti, garlic bread and wine. We stared at each other across from the table. He did his head boppy thing he does while he eats and he made his eating noises. :) <-- I miss it.
We went to bed early....about 8:45 PM. He passed out pretty quickly. It was too early for me to fall asleep so I just laid there and stared at him like a creeper. I stared at him for a good hour and a half.

Seth came home from Germany on December 16, 2009, after we'd been apart for 9 months. As if 9 months wasn't long enough for us, we've decided...or the Army decided for us...that 10 months is even cooler to be apart this time around. 10 months is about to come to a screeching halt in a few weeks and I will not be a jerkface and refuse to hug him this time around. Is it January yet?

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Webcamming on Christmas?

I’m really hoping that Seth and I will be able to webcam at some point in the day on Christmas. I plan to wake up at my parents on Christmas morning, open gifts there, go to his parents, have breakfast there and be with them while they open gifts and then I’ll hang out with them until they go to Seth’s grandma’s house to eat, which will probably be around 1. Then I’ll head back to my parent’s house and I’ll spend the rest of the afternoon there. Luckily, our parents’ only live about 20 minutes from each other. So yeah, in between all this, I would like to webcam with my love. While planning all this in my head, a few logical problems arose:
  1. I don’t have a laptop that has a webcam
  2. I will be at my parent’s house and they have a desktop, sans webcam
  3. Seth’s parents have a webcam, but it might be kind of awkward if I ask them, hey…can I use your computer so I can see Seth? Actually it probably wouldn’t be awkward, I would just feel awkward because I’d be the loner in the office not socializing with everyone. I could be like Kip, in Napoleon Dynomite, when he says “Napoleon, don’t be jealous that I’ve been chatting online with babes all day.” Seth is a babe.
  4. I contemplated bringing my webcam to my parent’s house to set up there
Then yesterday, I remembered that my dad has a work laptop that has a webcam. So I called him and asked him to please be sure that he brings it home over Christmas break (or else I’ll make him go to work and get it on Christmas morning…). He then asked if I would also like him to bring a big projector monitor (we're talking like a 50 inch screen...) so Seth can be displayed for all to see. As much as I would LOVE to see this happen, I really do not think Seth would appreciate this. Actually, I know he’d hate it. He dislikes being put “on display” like that. Because I love him so, I will not torture and do this to him. Don’t get me wrong, I did consider it for a quick moment, but then decided against it. Out of pure love.

Seth - you're welcome in advance and you can thank me when you get home :) I love you!!!! xxoo

Monday, December 13, 2010

Happy Snow-Day!! :)

Today is a snow day at work/school. I still have to come to work, but it’s much quieter and I’m able to get caught up on a lot of things. Such as blogging about what my cubicle looks like.

It’s very pretty – we have carpet from the 60’s…hell, maybe earlier than that. It’s orange and brown and really nasty. It’s never vacuumed, it’s never dusted in here, and it’s never cleaned by our “custodians.” I have my own Lysol bleach wipes that I regularly sanitize my desk with, but I surely don’t haul my vacuum into work each week and clean it up.

The last few weeks, since it’s started getting colder out and our heat has been turned on….our heat has been full force. I think we have radiator type heat and water runs through the pipes. There is, I’m sure, a minimum of 4.2459 inches of dust built up on these heaters and when the heaters are heated, it heats up the dust and spreads it like… magical fairy dust. I’m sure my lungs are black, like a lifelong smoker’s, yet I’ve never smoked a cigarette in my life, all because of the air “quality” (I use that term very loosely) in here. So the heaters are on full blast and it’s been hotter than hell in here (mind you, I’m always very cold…I’ve always got my own personal heater AND a blanket). I’ve not turned on my personal heater and I’ve not used my blanket….because it’s been TOO warm in here. My coworker opens the windows in the morning because it’s so stuffy in here. But rest assured, because it’s so warm in here, the stupid air conditioning has been on regularly too. Yep, we have a too warm heater going during the work day, and the a/c comes on about every 10-15 minutes and cools it down. The heat is REALLY drying too. My hair has been a static-y mess the last few weeks. My coworker is getting shocked constantly while working on computers. My throat is dry and most days, I’ve chugged my whole Nalgene bottle….32 oz by the end of the work day!! Over the weekend, I purchased a “filter free warm mist humidifier.” It’s supposed to “help bring relief from sinus irritation and other effects of dry air.” I hope it makes me breathe a little easier, my hair a little less static, and my coworker get shocked less. I also hope I don’t get in trouble for having it. Actually, I don’t really care about that part.

(Part of my lovely cubicle. Sorry for the poor image, it's taken with my phone. That's my new fancy humidifier, with the lovely radiator heaters in the background. I'm storing it on a stolen filing cabinet. Notice the warped blinds on the right side of the picture? That's apparently because they were melting because they were resting on the radiator heaters. My coworker informed me of this, and raised them for me, so I wasn't responsible for catching this shithole on fire).

Don’t ask me how many times it’s leaked or flooded in here and the carpet has been pulled up, dried out, and then laid back nicely, like nothing happened. I wonder how much mold is growing underneath our floors. Actually, I don’t want to know.

We’re a public school system. We’ve been cutting our budget for the last 5 years, minimum. We’ve been eliminating positions because of budget cuts. The state has reneged money that we were supposed to have. We’ve take up fund raisers to help pay for necessities for our students. Is it really cost effective to have our heat running full force (hotter than what anyone would prefer) while simultaneously running the air conditioner?? I.THINK.NOT. Do we not have students and staff members who are making extreme sacrifices? We have WAY better ways to spend this money.

I will NOT miss the physical appearance and the ridiculously extreme heating and cooling that takes place year round. Is it July 2011 yet??

This turned into a rant that even I wasn’t expecting. Sorry about that!

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Tag - I'm it!

Erin at Amateur Hour in NC tagged me :)

1. Four shows that you watch:
  • The Big Bang Theory
  • Full House (yeah, I still watch it, don't judge me. So what if I'm 26 years old!).
  • Survivor
  • Good Luck, Charlie on ABCFamily. Again, don't judge me because I watch this. Charlie is cute, what can I say?
2. Four things you are passionate about:
  • Seth
  • Family
  • Kids
  • Working out
3. Four phrases you say a lot:
  • Whoadang
  • For real?
  • I love you
  • F that noise
4. Four things you've learned from the past:
  • Everything happens for a reason (although you may never learn that reason)
  • Don't look at a clock - it makes the time go by sooo slow
  • Never regret anything - what you said or did at the time was because of feelings you had then
  • I have a love hate relationship with surprises
5. Four places you would like to go:
  • Back to Germany
  • Ireland
  • Australia
  • Italy
6. Four things you did yesterday:
  • Worked out
  • Went Christmas shopping
  • Texted with Seth :)
  • Painted my nails
7. Four things you are looking forward to:
  • Seeing Seth in a few weeks!!!
  • Seeing Seth in a few weeks!!!
  • Seeing Seth in a few weeks!!!
8. Four things you love about Winter:
  • Snow days
  • December 29, 2009 :)
  • How pretty the snow is
  • Snow days
9. Four Bloggers who should share their List of Fours:


In the summer of 2007 and 2008, my sister spent her summer in Alaska. I went to visit her both summers. The summer I went in 2007, it was completely life changing. (That was the summer that Seth friended me on MySpace, too. It was July 3rd, 2007. I was sitting in an internet cafe in downtown Juneau and we exchanged a few emails). Anyways, I ran across this little faux blog that I wrote shortly after I got back that summer. I still love it and when I read it, it reminds me how much fun my sister and I had.

My sister, Holly, is about 18 months younger than me. We've always been extremely close and have been best friends since the day she was born. No matter what, I know I can call her and I can depend on her, and she'll always be there for me. We never really fought, and when we did, it was always over very quickly. We were always off in our own little world together and would do everything together while growing up. We're VERY different though. Once she went off to college, she found herself and she changed. She's still my little sister though and I'd do anything for her no matter what. I'm pretty traditional when it comes to most things, and she does what she wants, when she wants, how she wants. I'll have to do a blog about her one of these times.

Anywho, here's the little blog I wrote from September 4, 2007. (And lots of great pictures).

Raincoats and Juneau

It’s raining today and as I was getting my raincoat out of the closet, I got a whiff of the campfires and the sweaty smell that had penetrated my pink raincoat. Yes, it has been washed, but the smell of a good campfire is hard to get rid of, and quite frankly, I like the smell for many reasons.

It reminds me of 4th of July when Holly and I ran down the shore and mooned a cruise ship as it was leaving the Gastineau Channel, while we left the other people to build the campfire. That was really the first night I fell in love with my pink raincoat, as it hadn’t really rained the first week I was in Juneau.

It reminds me of the good times I had with Holly, my best friend, on the camping trip we took to Douglas Island, where Anthony brought a 45 mm gun, in case we encountered a bear. It reminds me of the boat ride we took to get to the island, where I was freezing cold from the wind, as we were floating across the water in the 17ft. skiff that I thought I would be scared of, but I wasn’t. And then I shed my raincoat once we pulled ashore because it was so soo warm outside. When I look at those pictures, of Douglas Island, I can feel the warmth of the sun on my back and on my face. It makes me smile and I miss it soooo much. It reminds me of the nights we spent camping that I used my raincoat as a pillow, as I intentionally left behind my real pillow at home. Or the nights I slept in my raincoat to keep warm.

(the porcupine that greeted us on the island when we arrived)

(The tide was so low and the water was pretty choppy, so Anthony had to let us out before we rounded the tip of the island. Then he walked the boat around the tip of the island, where we were able to tie it up).

(All of our gear. We spent one night and we brought THAT much!!! Andrew brought his guitar, we had a couple of coolers of alcohol, and there were 4 tents for 5 people. We travel "light.")

(Camp is set up. The ground was sooo soft here!! It was a big mossy bed and so comfortable)

(I went to go pee away from the rest of the group. I was facing the ocean and this was the most beautiful sight I've ever witnessed while going doing my business).

(Later that night, I went to peek out of the woods and saw the most gorgeous sunset ever).

(The next morning).

(See our boat in the background? See how far away it is from the water? Yeah, we were waiting for a good couple of hours for the tide to come in so we didn't have to literally pick up and carry the boat to the water. To kill time, we drank the rest of the beers, found a piece of driftwood and then proceeded to play baseball with empty beer cans and the driftwood as the bat. We also played golf with the driftwood and beer cans. Andrew played his guitar, we shot Anthony's gun and I wittled away a little piece of wood...I made it so sharp, I could probably have pierced a fish with it! We did this until it was getting later in the afternoon and it was taking too long for the tide to come in and we didn't want to be on the water in our small boat in the dark, soooo, we did this...)

(Found some driftwood logs, carried them to the boat and rolled the boat over the logs, until the boat was over the last log. Then we'd get the logs from the back and put them in front of the boat again (is there a term for this process?! If so, I have no idea...) until the boat and the water were reunited in love. That boat was HEAVY!).

It reminds me of the time we spent in Haines, hiking with our five beer growlers, sweating our asses off and hoping to hitch a ride. (We succeeded, six different times, I might add). It reminds me on our hike to Battery Point in Haines, walking through the rain forest and getting all muddy and loving it. And the night we went to the Haines Library (voted the best small library in America in 2005), semi-drunk, and walked back to camp in the drizzly rain, cold and wishing we could build a campfire in the rain.

(Our five beer growlers...made out of glass and completely full. Again, we travel light).

(Notice our strategic tent set up...within a few feet of the bear food pole. In our defense, it was a very small campground (not even like a real campground, just a big open lawn area, right on the ocean. We could hear the waves crashing against the rocks all night long. It was beautiful). The other campers were all on the other side of the little grassy area, and we wanted to be away from them. So we set up our camp away from them. We didn't realize this until the follow day after our hike...we were walking down a hill when we noticed we set up camp pretty much right below the bear food pole!!! Luckily we made it out alive and I'm able to tell this story now).

(Looking out at the water on the hike to battery point. I love the different colors of the water).

(Tip of Battery Point, Haines, Alaska. Looking towards the town of Haines).

It reminds me of the time I spent on the whale watching boats, looking at humpback whales bubble netting, spouting and lifting their tails out of the water.

(The second time I went whale watching, it was a very foggy morning. This is when we saw the humpback whales bubble netting).

(The mama humpbacks getting ready to bubble net).

It reminds me of fishing on the dock for salmon and Holly repeatedly telling me that I look pretty dorky in my pink raincoat, with my hood on.

(Everyone was fishing off the docks here. Everyone caught so many fish. I spent a whole afternoon watching person after person real in another salmon).

(Someone cleaning a freshly caught salmon).

(We went back that night with my sister and some of her friends. Steve caught 3 salmon really quickly... and I caught a log....

(Steve taught Holly and I how to gut and clean a fish. A few days later, we had a big salmon feast and cooked them many different ways. Above is me gutting and cleaning the fish).

(Here I am holding the fish tail I chopped off. I still can't believe I did that. It was so cold and slimy and gross...but cool).

It reminds me of the glacier cruise that I took alone, on the Tracy Arm Fjord tour, where the walls of the fjord were upwards of 7,000 feet high, where there were chunks of ice floating in the water and I was standing outside on the boat, looking at South Sawyer Glacier calving, and watching 40 or 50 seals resting on the ice bergs or sliding off the ice bergs and eagles flying over head. It was about 40 degrees that day and I was so extremely cold and I spent the day shivering because there was NO heat on the boat and I only had my pink raincoat, a green sweater and a t-shirt.

(Getting ready to enter the Tracy Arm Fjord. The little black thing on the top right side of this glacier is a bald eagle. An iceberg is 10% above water and 90% below water. You can imagine how enormous this iceberg is).

(Another beautiful iceberg).

(A beautiful waterfall along the fjord).

(Walls of the fjord)

(Waterfall in the fjord)

(Getting closer to Sawyer Glacier. With all of the smaller icebergs in the water and our little boat going slowly over them, it made me feel like I was on the Titanic. It was actually pretty scary...I was on this boat with like 50 strangers. My sister had to work that day, but I really wanted to go on this tour, so I went on it all by myself. It was a full 8 hour tour that left from Juneau, went down to and back from the fjord, and then back into Juneau).

(South Sawyer Glacier, in Tracy Arm Fjord, south of Juneau, Alaska)

(South Sawyer Glacier)

(All the little black things are seals resting on icebergs!! It was amazing to see!! We got to see them jump up onto the icebergs, slide into the water and they kept staring at us. They were adorable!!!!)

When I got home, I was sad to wash the smell of these memories away. It doesn’t smell like ‘me,’ which is typically a Dior or Calvin Klein or Clinique or Davidoff perfume. It smells like campfires and sweat and good times in Juneau, Alaska. (For the record, I didn’t wear perfume in Alaska - shocking, if you know me).

I heard The Counting Crow’s “A Long December” yesterday and I was reminded of my last night in downtown Juneau, that Holly, Aimon and I spent at Pizzeria Romo’s, eating the shit out of the pesto pizza, talking about what that song reminds us of. And drinking beer, after Holly had ordered one and the waiter guy said, “are you being serious- you want that kind?”

I was fearless in that pink raincoat. I did things I never thought I would do, never imagined I could do. But I did them, and sure enough, I lived through all of those experiences. And I would do it all again in a heartbeat.